outdistanced | turbo heaven 🌼 chrono

I wish you could have, too - for real.

[ takes a deep breath. ]

He told me to tell you that there are still a lot of people you can trust and rely on, but he'll always listen if you aren't sure where else to go.

[ just. exhales, shakily. he's not going to cry, but it's a close thing. ]

...guess I know why he didn't reply to my letter, then. [ ugghh. ] Do you... need some space? Your head's probably a total mess, right now.

Probably. If you believe Iris, we were there for, like, three weeks.

No, no, it's fine. I wanted to talk to you about something else, anyway... before we get locked in.

Kinda messed up that he was there. Especially if it wasn't actually the him you knew.

[ ugh. uuuuggghhhhhhh awful vibes.

he stills, surprised. ]

Okay? What's up?

He helped me in the end, though. Could've been worse if I'd done what Director Hu wanted.

[ anyway ]

I meant to talk to you about it last week, but everything was a little... crazy? [ two cyoas, emotionshare, tavern... oof. ] I was still thinking about it, too, but I wanted to say - if something happens to me tonight, to try and find my book and my phone. I'll give you the password for my phone in case I can't unlock it in time, but I'll try to give you a way to find who it was with those.

...what did the Director want you to do?

[ does he want to know the answer to this? especially when the next part makes his blood run cold. he shakes, briefly, another push of tears to his eyes.

but it's practical. logical. just in case. nothing has to happen. ]

...yeah. Okay. I don't - I'll be with you, anyway, not that it ever helps anything. I'll give you mine, too. And- well, I wanted to mention something anyway. So I guess it's good timing.

[ but he's still hesitant. ]

She asked me to kill him. I never planned to, but... she tried to force it.

...Hey. [ letting his hand slip down to hold chrono's if he's allowed? he feels you shaking and kind of wishes he hadn't said anything, actually. ] I'm sorry. It - It was Saber's idea. Just in case. It doesn't mean something will happen.

[ deep and utter hatred crosses his expression for a moment. nothing is making him feel more trusting in any of this, actually.

the handhold stills him even further, for a second. there's a flash of something vulnerable that breaks the anger, before it's swallowed down, and he lets his fingers curl a bit. ]

Don't apologise. It's-- a good idea. Saber's practical like that. I'd want to know everything possible, right? You would, too.

Well, yeah, but... I'm not saying it to make you worry. You've been worried about me enough as it is. It's just the only thing I can do to try and help, you know?

If something did happen, the last thing I'd want is to leave you wondering about it like we were with Zhongli. That's all.

[ loosens his hold a little. ]

But I don't want make you think too hard about it, either. Honestly if anyone tried to come after me after this past week, I'd probably annoy them to death instead.

[ haha? listen he really has been really annoyed with everything so like. maybe. ]

You know I'm gonna overthink it anyway. Bad habit, y'know.

[ he does actually snort at the joke, but then sighs, closing his eyes. after a moment, shakes his head, resolute. ]

No, it's the right thing to do. I want to know. It's not going to ruin anything for me, don't worry. It's smart, and I'd be worse off without it. [ ... ] Thanks for trusting me.

I know, but still.

Of course I do? You're... one of the only people who haven't given me a reason not to.

[ besides zhongli. even yves, for all his kindness and care, hurt him pretty badly this weekend by killing firefly without even the slightest of warnings. meanwhile, the two of them have kind of stuck together through it all, as much as they could. it's plenty.

he is afraid to lose that, there's no guarantee that will happen, right? so it's fine. ]

[ ah.

it's not like he would give him any reason to, of course. he's just himself - brash, angry, overthinking. but despite everything, all the things he hasn't been able to do... well. it's nice to hear it.

he'll let the handhold drop, looking downward. ]

Guess I've got two things to tell you, now. [ with a deep breath; ] The first thing I hope is nothing. I don't want it to be something, and I'm fuckin' hoping it isn't and it's just stress gettin' to him, but... we need to keep an eye on Jiaoqiu. He was so blunt about checks last weekend but then didn't offer himself for strip checks, and when we spoke after he tried to tell me he thought-- thought Firefly was behind Zhongli's death, despite none of the evidence pointing to her. Our talks have been... just a little strange.

[ his eyes widen. he takes half a step back in shock. ]

I- What? But we don't even have any killers unaccounted for now. They usually act normal except on Thursday nights, right? So why... [ aaaaa??? ] And right when they said we shouldn't hesitate if someone's acting weird, too?

God, I hate it here. Hopefully it really is nothing, but... We can try to keep an eye out?

[ he swallows and resists the urge to reach out again. it's awful, to have to talk about this, the potential for further betrayal. ]

It really could be nothing -- he was determined to get things moving last week, and all of us make mistakes. [ ... ] Though, specifically, he talked about not being able to afford that. I don't know, but from what... what Akihiko said, it seems like the temptation of an apple doesn't just last through Thursday night. It's a slower thing, I think.

[ he squeezes his eyes closed. ]

Just-- let's keep an eye out, okay? We don't need to jump to conclusions, but I had to tell you just in case. Someone else needed to know, and you're the person I trust most. So... I'm sorry.

I mean... we all want answers, so maybe it is just that.

[ but now he's worried. this is awful, having to think about people you care about like this. the bit about the apples... is also concerning. a slow build makes sense with the orchard just kind of waiting there for them, doesn't it. ]

Okay. We'll keep an eye out and figure out where to go from there.

[ hopefully it's just the paranoia getting to them. but it's better safe than sorry, right? he simply won't think about what they're supposed to do if it's right to suspect jiaoqiu. that's a later problem. ]

Yeah. That's all we need to do. It's better if there's two of us, just... just in case.

[ on that note... it doesn't feel quite right. but he has to say something, before

before the chance slips by, again. ]

The other thing... I hope means more than nothing, but I need you to know first that it doesn't need to make anything different between us. It's just me getting my thoughts out, because bein' honest with each other is what we're doing. Can you just... promise me that, first?

[ it's a horrible feeling. probably not that different to what chrono felt on hearing about his own plans - it's smart, but not exactly comforting.

he breathes a sigh, and tries to shake that feeling off as well as he can to focus on the rest that chrono has to say. it's still a little disconcerting, the way he starts this off. laurence can't help but worry a little. ]

...Okay. I promise.

[ it takes a long moment for him to gather everything. it's not courage or confidence, at this point. just a muddle of doubt and concern that needs to be untied. ]

The past couple of weeks, you've been through so much. We've stuck together. The value in this, your trust despite... despite everything that's been hurting - the fact you listened, and noticed, and helped me when I've been losin' it. The friendship we've made, it's beyond what I expected from anyone here. I know we got along since the start, despite arguing... but...

[ he rubs his face, briefly. ]

It's become more than that, for me. There was a crossover, I guess - I don't know when, but I know how, if- if that makes sense. Wanting to reach out, more often. [ ... ] So. That's it. Just had to let you know.

[ this is so terribly upfront that laurence is already squirming and flushing a little even at the first part because he is so, so bad with this stuff, but.

huh? ]

When... When you say more...

[ he can't be hearing this right, can he? ]

[ weirdly, it makes him laugh a little. ]

Dude, seriously? I thought that was pretty clear. You're gonna make me say it out loud?

[ well

he's just going to sit on his dumb hospital bed for the second time this week and just turn beet fucking red. oh god. what. what? what!

help! ]

[ well. it's better than getting yelled at.

he'll very tentatively come over and sit next to him, a far enough distance so they're not touching at all, lean back on his hands and give him a couple of minutes. his chest hurts already. ]

[ yeah he definitely needs a few. but he doesn't pull away, he just kind of. stares blankly at the floor while he tries to work this out through the internal screaming.

eventually, he shifts to run a hand through his hair. hhhh ]

...Sorry. I'm really bad with this stuff. [ as if it weren't obvious already. he's embarrassed to be this embarrassed. god. why is he like this. ] And I just told you to-- god.

[ HE REALLY JUST TOLD THIS GUY WHAT TO DO IF HE'S MURDERED AND NOW THIS. MORTIFYING.

okay okay okay okay okay okay okay. deep breath, laurence. ]

I- I... kind of... feel that way, too...

[ he is doing to die right here and now actually ]

...I mean, like, that was pretty hard to do no matter what? Whether this came up or not, though I guess it helped me make a decision.

[ honesty and trust and consideration and understanding ; it's a big thing. a little too big, sometimes. well, at least he got it out there! that's all that needed to be done, really

wait what ]

...oh. Really? There was- a thought, that maybe, but- ah. [ okay the blunt honesty is wearing off now it's being turned around a little and he's. also going red. useful. ] Ahh. Aha, that's... that's good, right?

Still...

[ still! not ideal! if he had to admit thing like this to anyone, he never would have chosen to do it this way! ]

It's not bad.

[ his face is still burning. but with that response, he can kind of just bring himself to look at chrono - not fully, he's still a little too flustered for that, but like. a side glance. ]

What are you blushing for? You started this.

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